Just Joking

Bobdown · Bobdown

Comedy - Misunderstanding an Asian Australian talking to his Mum.

Whenarewethere · Whenarewethere

Why is the Holly Leaf used for Christmas. It has sharp edges so was not used to wipe your bum.

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

An old guy was working out at the gym when he spotted a young hot girl walking in.He asked the trainer standing next to him, "What machine should I use to impress that girl over there?"The trainer looked him up and down and said;"I would recommend the ATM in the lobby."

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Teacher: If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have? Johnny: Seven. Teacher: No, listen carefully If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have? Johnny: Seven. Teacher: Let me put it to you differently If I gave you two apples, and an...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

A woman runs a red traffic light and crashes into a mans car. Both of their cars are demolished but, amazingly, neither of them is hurt.After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says; Wow, just look at our cars! Theres nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we sho...

Magnarc · Magnarc

There was a young man from Westphalia, Who painted his ass like a dahlia, The colour was fine, Likewise the design, The aroma- ah, that was a failia.

Gundog · Gundog

Magnarc · Magnarc

There once was a fellow from Lorne, Who wished that he'd never been born, He wouldn't have been if his pappy had seen, That the end of his franger was torn.

Magnarc · Magnarc

In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking his madam, Loud was his mirth, For he knew that on earth, There were only two balls- and he had 'em.

Magnarc · Magnarc

There was a young sailor called Bates, Who danced the fandango on skates, But a fall on his cutlass, Rendered him nutless, And practically useless on dates/

Bobdown · Bobdown

Low Battery: A man saved his girlfriend's phone number on his mobile as 'Low Battery'. Whenever she calls him, in his absence, his wife takes the phone and plugs it into the charger. Give that man a medal Government Survey: A government survey has shown that 91 percent of illegal immigrants come...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Child-Bride: I've got splinters in my hand from that old broom.Me: Well you're silly - why didn't you take the car?Doc reckons I'll be able to see out of my right eye soon.

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.So the husband went to his ...veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that cou...

Bobdown · Bobdown

Manchester The following are all replies that Manchester women have written on Child Support Agency Forms in the section for listing "father's details;" or putting it another way.... Who's the Daddy? These are genuine excerpts from the forms. 1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, Ma...

anolphart · anolphart

How do Kiwis find sheep in long grass? Irresistible

yobarr · yobarr

It is common knowledge that there is a National Shortage of experienced Roadtrain drivers, but perhaps the shortage is greater than many realise?

Mein · Mein

Today, I went to Bunnings to buy a few things and while browsing in aisle 22, some little brat said to me, "Get out of my way you old fart!".So, if your son / grandson went missing while you were shopping at Bunnings today, he's locked in the blue toolbox on the bottom shelf at the end of aisle 22.

Mein · Mein

At least one of the staff members on the government medical help line should be retrained.I phoned the medical help line today and ask for some advice about the best way to use a suppository.You wouldn't believe what she said to me!

Mein · Mein

Telling your suitcases there'll be no overseas holiday this year can be tough. Emotional baggage is the worst!

anolphart · anolphart

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Wrong subject (Preview) Comedy - Misunderstanding an Asian Australian talking to his Mum.	Bobdown	1	746	09:52 AM Dec 20, 2023 by peter67
	Holly Leaf for Christmas protocol (Preview) Why is the Holly Leaf used for Christmas. It has sharp edges so was not used to wipe your bum.	Whenarewethere	0	660	09:42 PM Dec 19, 2023 by Whenarewethere
	An old guy.. (Preview) An old guy was working out at the gym when he spotted a young hot girl walking in.He asked the trainer standing next to him, "What machine should I use to impress that girl over there?"The trainer looked him up and down and said;"I would recommend the ATM in the lobby."	aussie_paul	0	659	01:12 PM Dec 19, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Teacher.. (Preview) Teacher: If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have? Johnny: Seven. Teacher: No, listen carefully If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have? Johnny: Seven. Teacher: Let me put it to you differently If I gave you two apples, and an...	aussie_paul	1	974	04:08 PM Dec 18, 2023 by Craig1
	Men will never learn… (Preview) A woman runs a red traffic light and crashes into a mans car. Both of their cars are demolished but, amazingly, neither of them is hurt.After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says; Wow, just look at our cars! Theres nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we sho...	aussie_paul	0	698	07:18 PM Dec 17, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Odd ode4 (Preview) There was a young man from Westphalia, Who painted his ass like a dahlia, The colour was fine, Likewise the design, The aroma- ah, that was a failia.	Magnarc	0	768	11:27 AM Dec 15, 2023 by Magnarc
	have a giggle (Preview)	Gundog	3	909	09:49 AM Dec 15, 2023 by peter67
	Odd ode. (Preview) There once was a fellow from Lorne, Who wished that he'd never been born, He wouldn't have been if his pappy had seen, That the end of his franger was torn.	Magnarc	10	1177	10:17 AM Dec 14, 2023 by peter67
	Odd ode3 (Preview) In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking his madam, Loud was his mirth, For he knew that on earth, There were only two balls- and he had 'em.	Magnarc	1	586	10:15 AM Dec 14, 2023 by peter67
	Odd ode2 (Preview) There was a young sailor called Bates, Who danced the fandango on skates, But a fall on his cutlass, Rendered him nutless, And practically useless on dates/	Magnarc	2	822	09:07 AM Dec 13, 2023 by Craig1
	Quickies (Preview) Low Battery: A man saved his girlfriend's phone number on his mobile as 'Low Battery'. Whenever she calls him, in his absence, his wife takes the phone and plugs it into the charger. Give that man a medal Government Survey: A government survey has shown that 91 percent of illegal immigrants come...	Bobdown	1	792	07:24 PM Dec 12, 2023 by peter67
	Deserved it.. (Preview) Child-Bride: I've got splinters in my hand from that old broom.Me: Well you're silly - why didn't you take the car?Doc reckons I'll be able to see out of my right eye soon.	aussie_paul	0	836	01:02 PM Dec 12, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Redneck Vasectomy. 🙂 (Preview) After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.So the husband went to his ...veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that cou...	aussie_paul	0	646	01:01 PM Dec 12, 2023 by aussie_paul
	Manchester Fathers (Preview) Manchester The following are all replies that Manchester women have written on Child Support Agency Forms in the section for listing "father's details;" or putting it another way.... Who's the Daddy? These are genuine excerpts from the forms. 1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, Ma...	Bobdown	0	492	01:00 PM Dec 12, 2023 by Bobdown
	Finding sheep (Preview) How do Kiwis find sheep in long grass? Irresistible	anolphart	1	862	10:53 PM Dec 11, 2023 by Possum3
	Shortage of Truck Drivers (Preview) It is common knowledge that there is a National Shortage of experienced Roadtrain drivers, but perhaps the shortage is greater than many realise?	yobarr	16	1204	05:41 PM Dec 10, 2023 by dogbox
	Missing a son / grandson? (Preview) Today, I went to Bunnings to buy a few things and while browsing in aisle 22, some little brat said to me, "Get out of my way you old fart!".So, if your son / grandson went missing while you were shopping at Bunnings today, he's locked in the blue toolbox on the bottom shelf at the end of aisle 22.	Mein	0	774	03:21 PM Dec 9, 2023 by Mein
	Not helpful, just rude! (Preview) At least one of the staff members on the government medical help line should be retrained.I phoned the medical help line today and ask for some advice about the best way to use a suppository.You wouldn't believe what she said to me!	Mein	1	998	11:26 PM Dec 8, 2023 by Cupie
	Telling them can be tough (Preview) Telling your suitcases there'll be no overseas holiday this year can be tough. Emotional baggage is the worst!	Mein	0	769	11:15 PM Dec 8, 2023 by Mein
	Now available for men who menstruate ... (Preview)	anolphart	0	776	10:17 PM Dec 8, 2023 by anolphart
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