Just Joking

Yarra · Yarra

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realised I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back...

rgren2 · rgren2

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Gc4Mi4ocyDw&feature=youtu.be

Yarra · Yarra

Murphy goes to his friend Pat and says... "I'm sleeping with the Pastors wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after services for me?" Pat doesn't like it, but being Murphy's longtime friend, he agrees. After the service, he starts talking to the Pastor, asking him al...

rgren2 · rgren2

You think you have lived to be 80 plus and know who you are, then along comes someone and blows it all to hell!An old Marine Pilot sat down at the Starbucks, still wearing his old USMC flight jacket and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the...

Texas · Texas

A platoon of soldiers were patrolling north of Fallujah when they came upon an Isis terrorist, badly injured and unconscious.On the opposite side of the road was an Australian soldier in a similar but less serious state.The soldier was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the Pl...

Ron-D · Ron-D

Only

Yarra · Yarra

The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a saloon and sat down to drink a beer.After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said"Who owns the big white horse outside?"The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and said,"I do....Why?"The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said,"I just though...

Yarra · Yarra

One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK, but after a while she slowly...

Yarra · Yarra

In an effort to identify with the common folk, the mayor's wife was asked to ride the bus to and from her various functions. All went well until one day when an obviously drunk man, smelling of alcohol, boarded the bus and sat downnext to her.The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lips...

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

One for the ladies.... I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctors office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:4...

rgren2 · rgren2

DID NOAH FISH?A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?""No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms."

bluemoon2 · bluemoon2

aussie_paul · aussie_paul

Aussie Paul. -- Edited by aussie_paul on Wednesday 21st of September 2016 08:52:36 PM

Yarra · Yarra

A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn't seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a gentleman neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes. The woman asked the gentlemen,"What do you do to get your tomatoes so red?" The ge...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

erad · erad

A farmer decied it was time to upgrade his herd of cows, so he went to the bank maanger and got approval to buy a new bull at the next bull sale - the following week. He bought the bull and took it home. A week or so later, the bank manager saw the farmer in the street. "How's the new bull going?" asked the bank ma...

Woody n Sue · Woody n Sue

Yarra · Yarra

The only cow in a small town in Northern Italy stopped giving milk. Then the town folk found they could buy a cow in Sicily quite cheaply. So, they brought the cow over from Sicily. It was absolutely wonderful. it produced lots of milk every day and everyone was happy.They bought a bull to mate with the co...

oldphartz · oldphartz

Shouldn't be riding 2 abreast. Damned if I could get passed. Wasn't safe. Was it? Doc asked I had palpitations. At 70 years all I was suffering was wishful thinking. -- Edited by oldphartz on Sunday 18th of September 2016 08:34:21 PM

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Social Security (Preview) After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realised I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back...	Yarra	1	876	10:55 AM Oct 1, 2016 by Aus-Kiwi
	And they breed and vote. (Preview) https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Gc4Mi4ocyDw&feature=youtu.be	rgren2	1	1083	09:14 PM Sep 29, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	The Pastor (Preview) Murphy goes to his friend Pat and says... "I'm sleeping with the Pastors wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after services for me?" Pat doesn't like it, but being Murphy's longtime friend, he agrees. After the service, he starts talking to the Pastor, asking him al...	Yarra	1	1044	04:40 AM Sep 29, 2016 by Blues Man
	The Pilot (Preview) You think you have lived to be 80 plus and know who you are, then along comes someone and blows it all to hell!An old Marine Pilot sat down at the Starbucks, still wearing his old USMC flight jacket and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the...	rgren2	0	942	08:59 AM Sep 28, 2016 by rgren2
	Tuesday Giggle (Preview) A platoon of soldiers were patrolling north of Fallujah when they came upon an Isis terrorist, badly injured and unconscious.On the opposite side of the road was an Australian soldier in a similar but less serious state.The soldier was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the Pl...	Texas	0	1065	07:39 PM Sep 27, 2016 by Texas
	Only in America (Preview) Only	Ron-D	27	2450	07:01 AM Sep 27, 2016 by dorian
	The Lone Ranger (Preview) The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a saloon and sat down to drink a beer.After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said"Who owns the big white horse outside?"The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and said,"I do....Why?"The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said,"I just though...	Yarra	0	1049	09:33 AM Sep 26, 2016 by Yarra
	Elderly Mother (Preview) One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK, but after a while she slowly...	Yarra	0	1076	09:47 AM Sep 25, 2016 by Yarra
	What's that? (Preview) In an effort to identify with the common folk, the mayor's wife was asked to ride the bus to and from her various functions. All went well until one day when an obviously drunk man, smelling of alcohol, boarded the bus and sat downnext to her.The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lips...	Yarra	0	937	09:35 AM Sep 25, 2016 by Yarra
	The Most Awkward Gynecologist Visit Ever (Preview) One for the ladies.... I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctors office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:4...	aussie_paul	0	1038	09:07 PM Sep 24, 2016 by aussie_paul
	Noah (Preview) DID NOAH FISH?A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?""No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms."	rgren2	0	946	07:09 PM Sep 24, 2016 by rgren2
	Clever cat ! (Preview)	bluemoon2	0	926	10:33 PM Sep 23, 2016 by bluemoon2
	A different fruit... (Preview) Aussie Paul. -- Edited by aussie_paul on Wednesday 21st of September 2016 08:52:36 PM	aussie_paul	1	1265	10:38 PM Sep 21, 2016 by Moorey
	Growing Tomatoes (Preview) A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn't seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a gentleman neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes. The woman asked the gentlemen,"What do you do to get your tomatoes so red?" The ge...	Yarra	1	1058	02:06 PM Sep 20, 2016 by KFT
	It's not really about politics (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	997	09:53 PM Sep 19, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	Of mice and men (Preview)	Woody n Sue	0	888	09:50 PM Sep 19, 2016 by Woody n Sue
	A new Bull (Preview) A farmer decied it was time to upgrade his herd of cows, so he went to the bank maanger and got approval to buy a new bull at the next bull sale - the following week. He bought the bull and took it home. A week or so later, the bank manager saw the farmer in the street. "How's the new bull going?" asked the bank ma...	erad	0	1070	01:20 PM Sep 19, 2016 by erad
	Something men would appreciate Oh yes there has been times (Preview)	Woody n Sue	1	973	11:08 AM Sep 19, 2016 by Diggings
	Cheap cow... (Preview) The only cow in a small town in Northern Italy stopped giving milk. Then the town folk found they could buy a cow in Sicily quite cheaply. So, they brought the cow over from Sicily. It was absolutely wonderful. it produced lots of milk every day and everyone was happy.They bought a bull to mate with the co...	Yarra	0	933	09:42 AM Sep 19, 2016 by Yarra
	Stuck for 2 hours behind. (Preview) Shouldn't be riding 2 abreast. Damned if I could get passed. Wasn't safe. Was it? Doc asked I had palpitations. At 70 years all I was suffering was wishful thinking. -- Edited by oldphartz on Sunday 18th of September 2016 08:34:21 PM	oldphartz	2	1118	08:51 PM Sep 18, 2016 by KFT
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