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True test...
(Preview)
A woman, who was cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note for him saying:"I've had enough and left you, don't bother coming after me".As soon as she heard him coming home she hid under the bed to see his reaction when he read her note.When the husband had parked th...
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aussie_paul
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1
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1046
|
|
|
|
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The Spitfire Pilot
(Preview)
A World War II Spitfire pilot is speaking in a church and reminiscing about his war experiences. "In 1942, the situation was really tough. The Germans had a very strong air force. I remember, one day, I was protecting the bombers and suddenly, out of the clouds, these Fokkers appeared!"There are a few...
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fwdoz
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2
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841
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|
|
|
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Who was that?
(Preview)
A woman has a saucy secret rendezvous with her lover, who also happens to be her husbands best friend, and they make love for hours. Afterwards, as theyre lying in bed together, the womans home telephone rings. As she answers, her lover listens in, only hearing her side of the conversation. Hello? Oh,...
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Possum3
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0
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953
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|
|
|
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Mentioned in the will.
(Preview)
Doug was writing his last will and testament in his nursing home. He was surrounded by his wife, his three daughters and his nurses. Slowly he went through each family member and told them what they stand to inherit, after he has passed away. My daughters, each of you will take my offices in the city, my a...
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Possum3
|
0
|
771
|
|
|
|
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English Comedian (Risque')
(Preview)
https://www.facebook.com/bbciplayer/videos/855728171481713/UzpfSTU2MTAyNzc5MToxMDE1Njg2Mjc2NTk4Mjc5Mg/
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Possum3
|
1
|
769
|
|
|
|
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Answered prayers.
(Preview)
The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and...
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Possum3
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0
|
699
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|
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The winning toast
(Preview)
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said "Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!"That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!He went home and told his wife, Mary "I won the prize for the Best Toast Of The Night".She said "Aye, did ye now. And what was your t...
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fwdoz
|
0
|
783
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|
|
|
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Suspicious wife
(Preview)
A woman was sure that her husband was cheating on her and having an affair with the maid. So she laid down a trap. One evening she suddenly sent the maid home for the weekend and didn't tell the husband. That night when they went to bed, the husband gave the old story "Excuse me my dear, my stomach aches" and...
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fwdoz
|
0
|
722
|
|
|
|
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Doctor and a Lawyer.
(Preview)
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer: What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advic...
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Possum3
|
1
|
771
|
|
|
|
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Scottish granny reading donkey
(Preview)
Omg. I hope it works. I was in tears.
|
Lesley F
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4
|
1008
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|
|
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Did you see that?
(Preview)
A couple are out hiking when the man stops and asks: "Did you see that?". "No," the woman replies. "Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead!" the man exclaims. A few minutes later the man stops again and asks: "Did you see that?". "See what?" the woman replies. "Are you blind? There was a big black bear w...
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Possum3
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0
|
644
|
|
|
|
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Missing pils.
(Preview)
A teenager approached his grandmother nervously and asked her a question. Granny, have you seen a bottle of pills lying around? The label says LSD, he asked. The grandmother swung around quickly as the boy prepared to be scolded. To hell with the pills! Have you seen the dragon in the kitchen?!
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Possum3
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3
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953
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|
|
|
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Age 104.
(Preview)
A reporter was interviewing a 104-year-old woman for her newspaper. So, what do you think is the best thing about being 104? the reporter asked. She shrugged with a smile and simply replied: No peer pressure.
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Possum3
|
0
|
891
|
|
|
|
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Swimming with dolphins...
(Preview)
|
aussie_paul
|
1
|
770
|
|
|
|
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Naked Wife
(Preview)
The wife came out of the bathroom after her shower, stark naked and walked into the bedroom. She said to me "Babe, shut the curtains, I don't want the neighbours to see me naked." "Don't worry," I replied, "if the neighbours see you naked, they'll shut their own curtains!"
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fwdoz
|
1
|
935
|
|
|
|
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Warranty.
(Preview)
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aussie_paul
|
2
|
828
|
|
|
|
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Darts
(Preview)
The other day I pinned a picture of my wife to the bull's eye of my dartboard and was trying to hit her in the face with a new set of top-flights I had just bought with our vacation money (what actually started the argument and hostility). Anyway, I just couldn't get it 100% on target, and as I was throwing, s...
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fwdoz
|
1
|
670
|
|
|
|
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Religious Sign
(Preview)
One day a cop driving down the street saw two ladies with a sign that read "Two girls for the price of one". He stops and tells them to get rid of the sign or he will run them in! They comply and he proceeds down the street only to pass a man with a sign that says Jesus Saves. The cop just waves as he passes and the g...
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fwdoz
|
1
|
639
|
|
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The Beaver
(Preview)
Johnny was playing outside when he had to go to the bathroom. He runs inside his house and his grandma was in the bathroom naked about to take a shower. He looks at her nether regions and says "What's that?" She says "Well, it's a beaver, Johnny". The next day the same thing happens, only his mum is taking t...
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fwdoz
|
1
|
754
|
|
|
|
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The bus hold up
(Preview)
One day on a bus, every passenger was female. There was a student, a waitress, a flight attendant, a hooker and a nun. Then a guy boarded the bus and declared a hold up. So everybody gave their money, jewelleries and other pricey belongings. But the robber wasn't content. He threatened "I will do each on...
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fwdoz
|
1
|
769
|
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