|
In the future.
(Preview)
Three elderly men are talking about their grandchildren one day. Talk quickly turns to what the men think their grandchildren would be saying about them 50 years from now. I would love my grandchildren to say, He was successful in business, the first man says. The second man thinks for a minute and giv...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
674
|
|
|
|
|
Well now,...this sounds perfectly logical to me....
(Preview)
..I understand there is also a round hole in the Sperm Bank's front door...used as a ...'Night Deposit Box'....Hoo Roo
|
Goldfinger
|
1
|
852
|
|
|
|
|
Badly injured and unconscious
(Preview)
A platoon of soldiers was patrolling north of Fallujah when they came upon an Isis terrorist, badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an Australian soldier in a similar, but less serious, state. The soldier was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, th...
|
Paintar
|
0
|
915
|
|
|
|
|
David Thorne 9: Gym Membership is how much?
(Preview)
From: Jeff Peters Date: Wednesday 8 April 2009 10.22am To: David Thorne Subject: Membership Renewal Dear David This is a friendly reminder to let you know your gym membership expired last week. Your membership is important to us and we would like to take this opportunity to show our appreciation by o...
|
fwdoz
|
1
|
796
|
|
|
|
|
A tad more to his left...and this may not have been anywhere near as funny to this bloke...it repeats in slow motion....
(Preview)
http://www.military.com/video/off-duty/odd/man-almost-killed-after-shooting-fridge-filled-with-tannerite/5478833126001 -- Edited by Goldfinger on Sunday 2nd of December 2018 05:01:29 PM
|
Goldfinger
|
1
|
775
|
|
|
|
|
5 Masculine Moments.....clean....simply click
(Preview)
|
Goldfinger
|
2
|
877
|
|
|
|
|
Subtle .... Think about it.
(Preview)
A man named Mitch walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder. Curious, the barmaid behind the bar looks at the creature on Mitchs shoulder and asks him what he calls it. Oh, his name is Tiny, Mitch replies. The barmaid asks why Mitch calls his pet Tiny. Mitch thinks for a minute before giving his answer. B...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
892
|
|
|
|
|
Missed the train
(Preview)
Young John was with his parents at the station waiting for the next train. They were having a drink inside when they heard a whistle. The three of them rushed out of the bar onto the platform, only to discover that they had just missed the train. "The next train is in one hour," said the station master. The...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
788
|
|
|
|
|
David Thorne 8: Blockbuster Late Movie Fees
(Preview)
Dear Blockbuster member, we know you have our DVD's and we want them back.I find it annoying to pay late fees on movies and I am too lazy to return them on time which leaves simply complaining about it. I used to know a guy named Matthew who would sell me copies of the latest movies for five dollars each but t...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
806
|
|
|
|
|
.....The Old Cowboy....no-one can say I'm not couth...
(Preview)
A young cowpoke walks into the Saloon. He sits at the Bar and notices an old cowboy with his arms folded, staring blankly at a full bowl of soup. After fifteen minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the young cowpoke bravely asked the the old cowboy, "If'n you ain't gonna eat that there soup..do you...
|
Goldfinger
|
0
|
745
|
|
|
|
|
Jumping to it....
(Preview)
|
aussie_paul
|
0
|
755
|
|
|
|
|
David Thorne 7: Do You Have Any Pets?
(Preview)
Strata rules exist for the benefit and well-being of all residents From: David Thorne Date: Thursday 21 May 2009 10.16am To: Helen Bailey Subject: Pets in the building Dear Helen, Thankyou for your letter concerning pets in my apartment. I understand that having dogs in the apartment is a violation...
|
fwdoz
|
2
|
978
|
|
|
|
|
Romantic
(Preview)
An older couple was lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep, but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk. She said, You used to hold my hand when we were courting. Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second, and tried to get back to sleep. A few moments later she said, Then you use...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
820
|
|
|
|
|
David Thorne 6: Opinions & Censorship
(Preview)
From: Ella Johnson Date: Tuesday 31 May 2011 2.04pm To: David Thorne Subject: Book I've perused your website before and must admit I laughed at the story about the police officer. I work in a bookstore and when your book came in as stock, I made the mistake of browsing through it. While some of it was mild...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
630
|
|
|
|
|
Pervert
(Preview)
The phone rings and the wife answers. A pervert breaths heavily into the phone and says, "I bet you've got a tight Arse with no hair" The wife answers back, "Yes he's watching TV - Who shall I say is calling?"
|
Possum3
|
0
|
832
|
|
|
|
|
David Thorne 5: Martin's Dropshadows
(Preview)
"There's nothing wrong with my design, it just needs to be more branded."Martin's staff profile includes the following bio which I think Martin may have written himself: "Martin has a degree in fine arts and is a Windows expert. If you have a computer problem, Martin is your man. When he is not solvi...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
648
|
|
|
|
|
Three wishes
(Preview)
A woman finds a genies lamp. The genie comes out and says, You may have three wishes, but your husband will get 10 times more than what you wished for. The woman thought about this for a moment because she knew her husband was cheating on her. But after a while she agrees. Her first wish was that she would be...
|
Possum3
|
0
|
700
|
|
|
|
|
Giovanni's Honeymoon
(Preview)
After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride, Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old barbershop in Jersey to say hello to his friends.Giovanni said "Hey Luigi, how wassa da treep?" Luigi said "Everyting wasa perfecto except for da train ride down"."Whatayou mean, Luigi?" asked Gio...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
756
|
|
|
|
|
The Value of Paintings
(Preview)
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in her paintings that were on display. "Well, I have good news and bad news" the owner responded. "The good news is that a gentleman noticed your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. I told him it would and he bo...
|
fwdoz
|
0
|
765
|
|
|
|
|
A bloke calls his mate
(Preview)
A bloke calls his mate, the horse trainer, and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse. His mate asks "How will I recognize him?" "Thats easy, he's a midget with a speech impediment" So, the midget shows up, and the trainer asks him if he is looking for a male or female horse. "A female horth." So h...
|
Yendorane
|
1
|
856
|
|
|
