Just Joking

Leshill · Leshill

Funny

Possum3 · Possum3

Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his ...first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, '...

Possum3 · Possum3

A lady had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her to get back into the dating world. Finally, she said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "Mum I have someone for you to meet." Well, it was an immediate hit. They took to one ano...

Possum3 · Possum3

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?" When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the re...

Possum3 · Possum3

A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student fem...ale nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. "Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "...

Possum3 · Possum3

Paddy goes to the vet with his goldfish. "I think it's got epilepsy" he tells the vet. Vet takes a look and says "It seems calm enough to me". Paddy says, "I haven't taken it out of the bowl yet".... Paddy spies a letter lying on his doormat. It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND ". Paddy spends the next 2 hours...

Bobdown · Bobdown

Bud light commercial.........

Possum3 · Possum3

1. On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I dont like spicy food. 2. They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax. 3. We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the tax...

Possum3 · Possum3

The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The...

JayDee · JayDee

Possum3 · Possum3

A young guy from Charters Towers moves to Townsville and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job. The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says "Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in RetraVision in Charters Towers." Well, the boss was unsure, bu...

Possum3 · Possum3

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:... I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brou...

Bobdown · Bobdown

Good on him...........not for me.

sherbert · sherbert

Bit of nostalgia . -- Edited by sherbert on Monday 11th of May 2020 09:53:44 PM

JayDee · JayDee

This one could have been on the forum before. But!!! worth a repeat. There were two nuns... One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL). It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent. SM: Have you noticed that a man has been follo...

Bobdown · Bobdown

Bobdown · Bobdown

My urologist's office called the other day and explained that my scheduled appointment would now be done over the phone due to the coronavirus. One hour before the scheduled teleconference, I was instructed (via email) to administer my own urine test. This was to avoid those lab tests and costl...

Bobdown · Bobdown

Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment. This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format: Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ? A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. Q. Where w...

weggs · weggs

Can anyone advise on where to purchase a quality metal scoop(aluminium?) with a long handle> What brands price etc Thanks Weggs

Leshill · Leshill

Try it

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Irish wedding (Preview) Funny	Leshill	2	1051	09:29 PM May 19, 2020 by Tony Bev
	Reliable witness. (Preview) Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his ...first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, '...	Possum3	0	653	06:31 PM May 19, 2020 by Possum3
	Start again. (Preview) A lady had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her to get back into the dating world. Finally, she said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "Mum I have someone for you to meet." Well, it was an immediate hit. They took to one ano...	Possum3	0	676	02:10 PM May 19, 2020 by Possum3
	Sunday School. (Preview) Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?" When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the re...	Possum3	0	665	02:07 PM May 19, 2020 by Possum3
	Are my testicles black? (Preview) A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student fem...ale nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. "Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "...	Possum3	0	661	05:43 PM May 18, 2020 by Possum3
	Paddy. (Preview) Paddy goes to the vet with his goldfish. "I think it's got epilepsy" he tells the vet. Vet takes a look and says "It seems calm enough to me". Paddy says, "I haven't taken it out of the bowl yet".... Paddy spies a letter lying on his doormat. It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND ". Paddy spends the next 2 hours...	Possum3	1	867	04:52 PM May 18, 2020 by erad
	Good Dog (Preview) Bud light commercial.........	Bobdown	1	758	03:07 PM May 18, 2020 by Bicyclecamper
	ALLEGED COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY “THOMAS COOK HOLIDAYS” FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS (Preview) 1. On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I dont like spicy food. 2. They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax. 3. We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the tax...	Possum3	1	689	12:18 PM May 18, 2020 by Haji-Baba
	New Church Organist (Preview) The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The...	Possum3	0	519	12:03 PM May 18, 2020 by Possum3
	Who is right (Preview)	JayDee	0	725	06:51 AM May 18, 2020 by JayDee
	New Guy. (Preview) A young guy from Charters Towers moves to Townsville and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job. The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says "Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in RetraVision in Charters Towers." Well, the boss was unsure, bu...	Possum3	1	972	06:46 PM May 17, 2020 by Bicyclecamper
	I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. (Preview) Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:... I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brou...	Possum3	0	643	02:00 PM May 17, 2020 by Possum3
	Not all Old Geezers sit around all day. (Preview) Good on him...........not for me.	Bobdown	3	1073	10:12 PM May 15, 2020 by Long Weekend
	Nostalgia (Preview) Bit of nostalgia . -- Edited by sherbert on Monday 11th of May 2020 09:53:44 PM	sherbert	1	1328	05:52 PM May 15, 2020 by grahos
	there were 2 ladies ??? (Preview) This one could have been on the forum before. But!!! worth a repeat. There were two nuns... One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL). It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent. SM: Have you noticed that a man has been follo...	JayDee	0	1021	07:14 AM May 15, 2020 by JayDee
	Thursday's funnies (Preview)	Bobdown	0	956	05:20 PM May 14, 2020 by Bobdown
	New Urine Test! (Preview) My urologist's office called the other day and explained that my scheduled appointment would now be done over the phone due to the coronavirus. One hour before the scheduled teleconference, I was instructed (via email) to administer my own urine test. This was to avoid those lab tests and costl...	Bobdown	0	970	09:34 AM May 14, 2020 by Bobdown
	Economic Stimulus Payment (Preview) Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment. This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format: Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ? A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. Q. Where w...	Bobdown	2	1128	04:34 PM May 13, 2020 by Bicyclecamper
	metal scoop for beach metal detecting. (Preview) Can anyone advise on where to purchase a quality metal scoop(aluminium?) with a long handle> What brands price etc Thanks Weggs	weggs	1	907	04:09 PM May 13, 2020 by rgren2
	How to back a trailer (Preview) Try it	Leshill	3	1064	11:39 AM May 13, 2020 by Bobdown
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