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Post Info TOPIC: Pam Ayres - 50 Shades of Grey


The Happy Helper

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Pam Ayres - 50 Shades of Grey


FIFTY SHADES OF GREY BY PAM AYRES

The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;......
T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey".

Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread.

In her left hand she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.

Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!

Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!

She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
"I am a dominator!!"

Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.

She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!

Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My God what had I done!
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one!!"

Well readers, I can tell no more;
Of what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey!!

 



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jules
"Love is good for the human being!!"
(Ben, aged 10)



Guru

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biggrinbiggrin

Very funny but someone mimicking her style I reckon.  Just doesn't ring true in style (words etc) nor content.



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Guru

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you are right in your assumption, johnq, ! it was written by a Mr John Summers, When Pam Ayers was asked if she wrote it, ! She said NO, but i wish i did, as it is bloody great ! smile



-- Edited by dazren on Tuesday 10th of February 2015 12:23:40 PM

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IF IT IS TO BE !! IT IS UP TO ME !!!


Guru

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Good one Jules. biggrinbiggrinbiggrinbiggrinbiggrin



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Nappies and Politicians should be changed often . For the same reason .


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Dulux.jpg



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Guru

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dazren wrote:

you are right in your assumption, johnq, ! it was written by a Mr John Summers, When Pam Ayers was asked if she wrote it, ! She said NO, but i wish i did, as it is bloody great ! smile

-- Edited by dazren on Tuesday 10th of February 2015 12:23:40 PM


 smile Thanks.  She is a character.  I can imagine her saying that, good for her.



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