There is attitude and then there is a positive attitude!

"Life is not the way it's supposed to be - it's the way it is.

The way you cope with it is what makes the difference."

After his plane was hit and he was forced to eject, the RCN fighter pilot finally regained consciousness. He was in a hospital in a lot of pain. He found himself  in the ICU with tubes/IV drips in both arms, a breathing mask, wires monitoring every function and a nurse hovering over him looking worried. It was obvious he was in a life-threatening situation.

His nurse gave him a serious look, straight into his eyes. Knowing he was not only a fighter pilot, but a Sailor, she spoke to him softly and slowly, enunciating  each word:

"You may not feel anything from the waist down."

Somehow, he managed to mumble in reply,

"Can I feel your tits, then?"

And that, my friends, is a real positive attitude.

I have one in reserve for the day the doctor says to me:

Doctor - "Sorry to tell you Mike but we're going to have to operate"

Me - "Afterwards, will I be able to play the piano?"

Doctor - "Yes, of course"

Me - "That's good because I can't play it now"