Of the deli in the park

It was half past eight and he was scared

Cos it was getting dark

Now Dave is not a big girls blouse

The dark did not un-nerve him

But his Missus had sent him out for milk

At around about 2.30

The walk from where his van was parked

Was not that far at all

He told her he'd be back there

By the time the kettle boiled

But a bloke named Geoff from Bendigo

Was obviously in strife

Trying to erect an annex

With a not so helpful wife

Now putting up an annex

To David was a breeze

He said to Geoff 'I've put up

A bloody lot of these'

They got that annex sorted

As soon as you could blink

And Geoff absolutely insisted

That they had to have a drink

Then Bert came from his caravan

And joined the conversation

He'd been 'up the guts'...and 'across the top'

And all around the nation'

He'd brought a six pack with him

To help him share his wisdom

They thought if they would drink his beer

It was only fair to listen

They looked along the sites a bit

And noticed that 'old mate'

Was battling with a pop top

That was sadly out of date

So the trio moved along as one

To see what they could do

They were rewarded for their efforts

With some clean-skin home-made brew

Jack from Tumbarumba

Well he didn't mind a yarn

He'd been on the road for several months

Since he'd up and sold the farm

He was full of information

On batteries, solar power

He had an Esky full of coldies

So they stayed there for an hour

They were considerably smarter

Than they were a while before

And wheel bearings and tow bars

Were now well to the fore

Gordon from Wonthaggi

Was new to diesel heaters

So he joined in and traded notes

With a bloke named Wally Peters

There must have about ten blokes

Standing beer in hand

Swapping information

On vans and trips they planned

It seemed to be that they all agreed

When the conversations crowded

The smarter blokes just turn it up

And talk a little louder

They were leaning on the back

Of Arthur Johnson's Hilux Ute

He had an Engel full of Carlton Draught

He was a generous kind of coot

They got wound up on highway tolls

They really went to town

Free parking, pubs and football

They all went round and round

And Dave was in amongst it

He could always hold his own

He could come up with an answer

To any curve ball he was thrown

But somewhere back inside his mind

A message bobbing up

Like a picture of his missus

Waiting with a cup

He could make no sense of it

The message wasn't clear

So he went the obvious solution

And cracked another beer

But he had this deep foreboding

Down there in his belly

That for reasons he couldn't fathom

He should be in the deli

So here he was at half past eight

Full of beer and bloat

Putting blame upon his missus

For not giving him a note

He could simply not remember

What it was that he should get

Standing in the deli

He placed his safest bet

He got a bit of everything

He thought theyd ever need

From bread to soap and chewing gum

And a bag of parrot seed

He got some licorice all sorts

And lollies of that ilk

But poor old Dave walked out of there

Without a drop of milk

He got back to his caravan

As sheepish as could be

The little lady waiting

He'd have to wait and see

Just how deep the mire was

As he walked in the door

But she had gone and got the milk herself

She'd seen it all before

'Now David' she admonished him

'The next day out is mine'

The girls and I are going to chat

And drink a bit of wine'

Dave said 'that's alright dear

Have a lovely day

I can never really figure out

How women have so much to say'