My husband and I were dressed and ready to go out for a lovely evening of dinner and theater.
Having been burgled in the past, we turned on a nightlight, and then put the cat in the backyard.
When our Uber arrived, we walked out our front door and our rather tubby cat scooted between our legs and ran up the stairs.
Because our cat likes to chase our parakeet we didnt want to leave them alone in the house together.
So my husband ran inside to retrieve the cat and put her in the backyard again.
Because I didnt want the Uber driver to know our house was going to be empty all evening,
I explained to him that my husband would be out momentarily as he was just bidding good night to my mother.
A few minutes later he got into the Uber all hot and bothered and said, (to my growing horror and amusement) as the car pulled away,
Sorry it took so long but the stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her ass with a coat hanger to get her to come out!
She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck and wrapped her in a blanket so she wouldnt scratch me like she did last time.
Then I hauled her fat ass down the stairs and threw her in the backyard and she had better not sh#t in the vegetable garden again.
The silence in the Uber was deafening.
Buzz Lightbulb said
04:33 PM Jun 5, 2021
My dad told my mum to get ready because they were going to the casino in Townsville. She got dressed up in her best clothes. They arrived at the casino, dad got out of the car near the dumpsters and said "Help me get these beer bottles into the back of the car. I'm going to use them for my home brew."
My dad told my mum to get ready because they were going to the casino in Townsville. She got dressed up in her best clothes. They arrived at the casino, dad got out of the car near the dumpsters and said "Help me get these beer bottles into the back of the car. I'm going to use them for my home brew."
Mum w very cranky for a long time.