My New Neighbour. She's single. She's shapely.
She's beautiful and she lives  right across the street. I can see her place from my kitchen  window.
I watched as she got home from work this  evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street, up my driveway and knocked on the door.
I opened the door,  she looked at me and said, "I just got home, and I have this strong  urge to have a good time, dance, get drunk, and have sex tonight.  Are  you doing anything?"   I quickly replied, "Nope, I'm free!"

"Great," she said. "Can you watch my dog?"

Being a senior citizen really  sucks!