ITALIAN HONEYMOON - in a best a Italian accent a

After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride, Virginia, Luigi stopped by  his old barbershop in Jersey to say hello to  this friends.
 Giovanni said, "Hey Luigi, how wasa da treep?"
Luigi said, "Everyting wasa perfecto except for da train ride down."
"Whata you mean, Luigi?" asked Giovanni.
"Well, we boarda da train at Grana Central  Station. My beautiful Virginia ,  she pack a biga basket a food.
She brough at da vino, some nice cigars for me,  and we were lookina forward to da trip, and open upa da luncha basket .
The conductore  come aby, waga his finger at us anda say, 'no eat indisa car. Musta use a dining car..'
So, me and my beautiful Virginia, we go to da  dining car, eat a biga lunch and starta at open da bottle of a nice a  vino!
Conductore  walka by again, waga his finger and say, 'No drinka in disa car! Musta use a cluba car.' So, we go to cluba car.
While a drinkina da vino, I starta to lighta my biga cigar. The conductore, he waga is finger again and say, 'No a  smokina disa car. Musta go to a smokina car ..'
"We go to a smokina car and I smoke  a my biga cigar.
Then my beautiful Virginia and I, we go  to a sleeper car anda go to bed. We just about to go
boombada   boombada   and  the conductore, he walka through da hallway shouting at a top of his a voice ..

 
'Nofolka  Virginia   ! Nofolka  Virginia   !'

 
"Nexta time, I'ma just gonna taka  da bus."
 Richo 

LOL! gawd, how old is that one! but still a good one!