Penguins
 
Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins
 on the ice in Antarctica?
 Where do they go?
                                   
Wonder no more!

It is a well known fact the penguin is a very ritualistic bird.  
It lives an extremely ordered and complex life.
The penguin is committed to its family and will mate for life,  
as well as maintaining a form of compassionate contact  
with its offspring throughout its life. 

If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface,  
other members of the family and social circle  
have been known to dig holes in the ice,  
using their vestigial wings and beaks,
until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird  
to be rolled into and buried. 

The male penguins then gather in a circle
around the fresh grave and sing: 

 
 "FREEZE a jolly good fellow."  
                     
                     "Then, they kick him in THE ICE HOLE."

           (Fair dinkum, did you really believe I knew anything about penguins?)