One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt.. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'
'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'
Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the
neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
-------------------------------------------
Q: What do you
call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
-------------------------------------------
A man and his wife,
now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish..
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.
Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands..
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger.....
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.
'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'
He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! '
And they say blondes are dumb...
A couple is lying
in bed. The man says,
'I am going to make
you the happiest woman in the world.'
The woman replies,
'I'll miss you....'
-------------------------------------------------------
'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'
Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the
neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
-------------------------------------------Q: What do you
call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
-------------------------------------------
A man and his wife,
now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish..
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.
Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands..
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger.....
Whoosh...immediately he turned
90!!!
Gotta love that
fairy!
-----------------------------------------------------------Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-Q: Why do little
boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be
men.
--------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you
call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
---------------------------------------------
Q: What does it
mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
------------------------------------------
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end to wipe.
-------------------------------------------Q: How do you
keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the
email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
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