When I got out of the airforce I worked doing everything from photocopier engineer to car salesman. I even worked for Centrelink as a personal adviser in the early 2000s.
We had a number of serious violent disturbances in our office, the one that sent me to the wall was when the boss lady was king hit by a female customer for not approving an early benefit transfer. That was the straw that broke my camel's back.
I was sent to the GP and he told me I had stress related depression, anxiety, PTSD, panic attacks and a few other mental nasties. I looked him in the eye and said "no way known, Ive been in aircraft that were hit by lightning, barracks fires and a few other high stress situations, how can I possibly be depressed?"
So I went to the shrink, he was excellent and proved to me that I was depressed. DAMN!!!
This is a black dog that stays with you for a long time. We as ex servicemen are meant to be tough and do the dose of concrete thing.
Its now well over 10 years since that terrible time, I attempted to terminate my life twice. I have since learnt how to deal with this crap.
The first thing is to acknowledge it yourself, if you are feeling blue and get no joy out of life you may be depressed. There should be no stigma any more. Society is becoming more educated about mental illness and perhaps more tolerant of those of us who sometimes have to hide in corners because of the stigma.
I keep a tight rein on my feelings and anxiety, Im off the medication and use this lifestyle as an anti depressant.
When I was teaching we had a number of kids make attempts at their lives, saddest thing you can ever see. Lets openly discuss this and get some activity to keep our people safe. Take care of yourself and keep an eye out for your mood. Lets work together to put this mongrel black dog down or at least asleep.
Safe travels
the rocket said
01:53 PM Aug 27, 2014
A few simple words can save a life "are you ok".
Another thing I have learnt: If it doing you no good, get rid of it. be it things, relationships. whatever
I was sick once, I got better.
Cheers.
Rocket
Phil C said
02:11 PM Aug 27, 2014
the rocket wrote:
A few simple words can save a life "are you ok".
Another thing I have learnt: If it doing you no good, get rid of it. be it things, relationships. whatever
I was sick once, I got better.
Cheers.
Rocket
Yeah Rocket.
Are you OK? works for me.
Take care
cooee said
02:38 PM Aug 27, 2014
Hi Phil
Good that you have shared that with us.
I know you will get a lot of support from all here as there are many who have a similar experience.
I consider myself most fortunate not to have had any experience with Depression or the like .
Keep posting and let us know if we can help at all.
JRH said
03:03 PM Aug 27, 2014
Phil C wrote:
the rocket wrote:
A few simple words can save a life "are you ok".
Another thing I have learnt: If it doing you no good, get rid of it. be it things, relationships. whatever
I was sick once, I got better.
Cheers.
Rocket
Yeah Rocket.
Are you OK? works for me.
Take care
I suffer from Black Dog but I am learning to control him. It all goes back to when I was 12 years of age and my mother demanded one night that I have sex with her when I refused she kicked me out of the house dressed only in underwear, shorts, cotton shirt, shoes and socks, it was the middle of winter and the temp. dropped to 5 degrees C. I went into the old mans car and froze the whole night , he couldn't even bring me a blanket to keep me warm. He slept in hid bed all warm and comfortable.
Lesley F said
03:11 PM Aug 27, 2014
I once had a deep depression, with hard work, I overcame it.
I just checked the statistics, one in 5 will experience some type of mental illness, unfortunately, there's stigma and misunderstanding in the community.
If it returns, I'm not scared, it won't beat me, I'm in control.
Take care
The Hats said
03:43 PM Aug 27, 2014
mate found the can.
I have been llayed up in hospital for the last 6 weeks and will be 3-4 months before I am even close to normal.
I managed to pick up a Meningococcal strain in my spine a server infection that came to within 48 hrs of rendering paralyzed from the waist down.
I an still on antibiotics at home through a Picc line infusing 24 hrs a day Maybe for 3-4 more weeks. Before this hit me I was an above average fit 58 year old planing out big lap, We were going to run the business from the road.
Running a business which was going well now in jeopardy, the stress over the last 6 weeks has been enormous I thought I was as tough as nails When I hobbled back into my own living room yesterday on my crutches. I just broke down and wailed like a baby.
The realism of what almost happened hit me like a missile, and the fact that I am the business and I can not work in it for some. My saving grace is a couple of great mates that I can openly talk to and get my worries and concerns out in the open, and the fact that I can let it out, and if I need to sob my way through a hours deep and meaningful I can, I think this is the most important part in my view is being able to spill your guts to some one who will listen and who REALLY cares.
Anyway Que Que Sara Sara what will be will be.
I am trying to proceed using this motto Illegitimi non carborundum
Cripes, I have had my share also at different times and was really sad to hear about the GN's who have posted here, and hope your infection recovery goes well too Hats. More power to all of you !
JRH said
04:02 PM Aug 27, 2014
Vic41 wrote:
Cripes, I have had my share also at different times and was really sad to hear about the GN's who have posted here, and hope your infection recovery goes well too Hats. More power to all of you !
Thanks Vic.
Murraman said
04:17 PM Aug 27, 2014
It can be a terrible thing, My mother had suffered with depression for near on 40 years and it was not good, My wife has bouts of it and it is terrible to watch. Son has bi polar and goes through very bad periods but medication seems to be working.
We all have our up and downs but we really don't know how bad it gets till you suffer it, Thankfully I haven't. But I can tell you first hand it effects the people around those that do.
Roving-Dutchy said
04:27 PM Aug 27, 2014
If you feel you are suffering from depression or anxiety one of your first ports of call should be your GP, who can draw up a mental health plan for you that will entitle you to 10 visits to a psychologist or physiatrist Medicare pays an amount towards the cost of your treatment if you don't feel your GP is inclined to help you, see another doctor, advice can also be obtained from organizations such as Beyond Blue and Black Dog, help is out there for you but you must seek it out, just don't suffer on your own.
Cheers
David
the rocket said
04:44 PM Aug 27, 2014
Phil C wrote:
the rocket wrote:
A few simple words can save a life "are you ok".
Another thing I have learnt: If it doing you no good, get rid of it. be it things, relationships. whatever
I was sick once, I got better.
Cheers.
Rocket
Yeah Rocket.
Are you OK? works for me.
Take care
hi phil, yeah, I am ok.
the rocket said
04:48 PM Aug 27, 2014
The Hats wrote:
mate found the can.
I have been llayed up in hospital for the last 6 weeks and will be 3-4 months before I am even close to normal.
I managed to pick up a Meningococcal strain in my spine a server infection that came to within 48 hrs of rendering paralyzed from the waist down.
I an still on antibiotics at home through a Picc line infusing 24 hrs a day Maybe for 3-4 more weeks. Before this hit me I was an above average fit 58 year old planing out big lap, We were going to run the business from the road.
Running a business which was going well now in jeopardy, the stress over the last 6 weeks has been enormous I thought I was as tough as nails When I hobbled back into my own living room yesterday on my crutches. I just broke down and wailed like a baby.
The realism of what almost happened hit me like a missile, and the fact that I am the business and I can not work in it for some. My saving grace is a couple of great mates that I can openly talk to and get my worries and concerns out in the open, and the fact that I can let it out, and if I need to sob my way through a hours deep and meaningful I can, I think this is the most important part in my view is being able to spill your guts to some one who will listen and who REALLY cares.
Anyway Que Que Sara Sara what will be will be.
I am trying to proceed using this motto Illegitimi non carborundum
Cheers
The Hats
omg. you have been through the mill. how on earth did you get that? keep talking to people, lots of love coming your way. kind regards, rocket
The Doo crew said
04:50 PM Aug 27, 2014
Spent 21 years with Fire & Rescue, saw so many things that you should never see. Car crashes were the worst, when children were involved it was gut wrenching.
Thought i could handle it ok as all the bull**** & bravado the crew used to spruke it was considered weak to ask for or need help. Lucky for me i had "a mate" who could see the signs, talked to me & convinced me to stop drinking & seek help as the "Black Dog" was stalking me.
Taken me 10 years to get a better handle on it, in control most of the time now, but still have bad days.
GaryKelly said
04:58 PM Aug 27, 2014
Goodness me! Some disturbing stories here, but also positive attitudes. I was interested to read Phil C say that he uses the nomad lifestyle as an anti depressant. I've heard quite a few GNs say that life on the road is a great way to deal with anxiety, and I can believe it. They say a change is as good as a holiday, and I can't think of any other lifestyle that provides so much change! Every day is a new day and a new adventure. Best of luck to you all.
JRH said
06:34 PM Aug 27, 2014
GaryKelly wrote:
Goodness me! Some disturbing stories here, but also positive attitudes. I was interested to read Phil C say that he uses the nomad lifestyle as an anti depressant. I've heard quite a few GNs say that life on the road is a great way to deal with anxiety, and I can believe it. They say a change is as good as a holiday, and I can't think of any other lifestyle that provides so much change! Every day is a new day and a new adventure. Best of luck to you all.
Thank you GaryKelly I have learned to move on with my life but it is nice to know that people out there do care. Once again thank you so much.
pawsoz said
06:35 PM Aug 27, 2014
Asking the question Are you OK? is a wonderfull way to open up a chat/discussion or just connect with someone, it is something we can all do, especially try to make the time available in the freedom camp where there may be 1 or more travellers doint it n thier own, and be observant....sometimes the question may be 'brushed off' because the person has lost the ability to verbalise how he/she feels....
Something all of us who travel alone can do is keep some sort of daily record of how we are feeling, actually feeling...can be as simple as a word in one corner of the diary...if we get out of the habit of knowing how we are feeling we will soon 'forget' how to talk about our feelings....If anyone see's pawsaroundoz in a camp site feel free to come over for a chat If I don't see you pull in....(just beware of the 'guard Whippets!)
annie
Lesley F said
06:41 PM Aug 27, 2014
Mine was way back in the mid 1980's - thank goodness it never returned.
Phil C said
07:07 PM Aug 27, 2014
You are beautiful, heart people. The stories above have moved me to believe this is a good post.
Hats, you keep on kicking that disease in its cold butt. NEVER give up!
Annie, I keep a MSWORD document which I use as a diary. It reflects what we are doing, where we are (with photos) and a section on how Im feeling, works so well.
Lesley F welcome, you keep that black dog on his leash.
Cooee, thank you.
JRH you rock, keep going, I was fiddled with as a 7 year old by a 13 year old neighbour, so I have an inking of how you must feel.
There are probably a few I have missed, but thank you so much for sharing, sometimes its not easy. I have to tell you Im elevated and feeling magnificent right now.
Hugs and love to all of us.
-- Edited by Phil C on Wednesday 27th of August 2014 07:09:58 PM
pugs said
07:35 PM Aug 27, 2014
Know exactly where you are coming from Phil,I still have difficulties,did a PTSD program through Hollywood around 12 months ago,but I still go down for help.I admire those that are able to overcome the black dog as it really stuffs your life up.I wont get into my problems but Toodyay has lost a few to suicide including a 15yr old lad.
With good caring people(like this forum),a smile,how ya going,ya want to have a cuppa,let them talk and listen intently and you could make a difference. You all take care. Pugs
Kendo said
07:54 PM Aug 27, 2014
At this point 276 people have read this thread.
Rather than just becoming No. 277 and just moving on, I would like to offer my heartfelt support to those of you "out there" who are, and have battled these issues.
I am one of the lucky ones I suppose. I myself have not experienced depression or anxiety (I think?), but I have seen it's effects close at hand. I have people close to me "that suffer". Just because what they are experiencing doesn't make sense to me does not diminish the suffering and anguish they are going through.
I don't want to make any condescending comments here, but just to say that this post has reminded me that I should contact those people I have mentioned here and just see how they're going.
Jeff
kesa32 said
08:51 PM Aug 27, 2014
Another black dog battler here , on meds , one of our daughters was drugged and raped a few years ago now , she tried to take her own life twice in the following months afterwards , we didn't know , she was so deeply affected and just couldn't tell anyone until some time later ..... It was such a terrible thing , but we have all helped her through and now she's going ok,
Been years of doctors, medications and physiologists and severe downs , but time and lots of love and care do heal , slowly
And yes , personal care and support are vital
isuzuswag said
09:03 PM Aug 27, 2014
Great to hear your story and hopefully will encourage a few more to think about their view of life..
Once we accept where we fit in the scheme of things and are comfortable in our own skins we can get on with life. Its more restricted than we perhaps anticipated but finding new paths to maximise enjoyment is the key... Motorhome or grey nomadding is definitely the answer.
Im with you..
Blue said
09:09 PM Aug 27, 2014
its hard because every individual case can be, well, individual..
so you are in a dark place and can't "see" the way out...
people around you can't see the "dark" place that you are in and can't help...
I am ex RAEME of 12 years.. I've been out for over 13 years...
if your job is making you depressed then there are ways out..
ask yourself, what is the worst that can happen?
after I took discharge I ended up in the worst job ever in my life and I hated it.. the people there were total rsoles..
I wanted to leave ..
the mrs said that, we have a mortgage that we nee to pay so you need to find a job before you leave...
eventually I did.. but over the weeks I was in a hole I couldn't get out of and lost 6kg of weight in a short time..
when I finally got a job I didn't even finish my 2 weeks notice and when I got to the next job which was doing the same as the last job, it was totally different and I LOVED IT!!!!
looking back..
my mrs had a job and we could have done the sums and worked out that we could have paid the mortgage if I left my job... that would have got me out of the hole that I was in at the time.. at the time I couldn't see it and she couldn't see it..
if my mrs ever gets into a position where her work was over coming her, I know how to handle it.. I make enough money to pay the bills so I'd tell her to LEAVE that workplace and start looking for alternative work that she was happy in.. ..
if you are stuck in a job that is making you depressed, DO THE SUMS, and get out of it
but that is just a one case scenario..
if me or the mrs are in that position again I know what to do... cut the fat within the household and leave the job..
-- Edited by Blue on Wednesday 27th of August 2014 09:09:45 PM
isuzuswag said
09:12 PM Aug 27, 2014
kesa32 wrote:
Another black dog battler here , on meds , one of our daughters was drugged and raped a few years ago now , she tried to take her own life twice in the following months afterwards , we didn't know , she was so deeply affected and just couldn't tell anyone until some time later ..... It was such a terrible thing , but we have all helped her through and now she's going ok,
Been years of doctors, medications and physiologists and severe downs , but time and lots of love and care do heal , slowly
And yes , personal care and support are vital
Wow... the nightmares you must have undergone when someone so close to you has experienced so much pain... My heart goes out to you and the family.....
Your support was invaluable in and essential for her recovery...
isuzuswag said
09:24 PM Aug 27, 2014
I was diagnosed with PTSD in 1992.. I struggled with the diagnosis and treatment for 4 years spending some 16 months just sleeping and resting..
4 years later and in 1996 my wife of 26 years ran off with a bloke from her work.... My treatment for PTSD had to go on the back burner as I was forced into a defensive mode to resist her fight to get more than her share of property.. I do the defensive thing very well.. I take no prisoners... She left me with 3 kids and got up to all sorts of dirty tricks to lay claim to houses we had etc etc...
The whole thing took 2 years, she borrowed money to fight me and eventually lost everything.... I was left with just the family home and 3 kids.. All my lives work and investment gone... The judicial system and barristers let me down..
I sometimes reflect on my life and look back at a time when I was 21 and had just returned from Vietnam as a Soldier only to find that my father had stolen all my savings... I had nothing to show for my 16 month stint...
What do I have to do to find someone to trust?
Im 66 now and have learnt to rely only on my own resources.... The PTSD is in limbo.... the Grey Nomad lifestyle and the prospect of meeting like minded people gives me hope and reasons to look forward to tomorrow.....
I look forward to meeting some if not all of you just to able to shake your hand knowing you too have been to hell and maybe back.. :)
Kaid said
09:25 PM Aug 27, 2014
I too have known depression and anxiety.
Still on medication for it but in the process of weaning myself off it.
Was literally eating myself to death as a way of trying to cope.
I have some wonderful girlfriends who have allowed me to cry buckets on their shoulders.
Have taken myself to a hypnotherapist and this has helped so much.
Just being there for a person with depression and anxiety can mean more than you realize.
R U Ok?
Don't ever be embarrassed to ask for help.
It just might be closer than you think.
Vic41 said
09:32 PM Aug 27, 2014
Most of you would be aware of Beyond Blue, here is their website, worth a read;
-- Edited by Vic41 on Thursday 28th of August 2014 01:15:13 AM
Blue said
09:41 PM Aug 27, 2014
isuzuswag wrote:
I was diagnosed with PTSD in 1992.. I struggled with the diagnosis and treatment for 4 years spending some 16 months just sleeping and resting..
4 years later and in 1996 my wife of 26 years ran off with a bloke from her work.... My treatment for PTSD had to go on the back burner as I was forced into a defensive mode to resist her fight to get more than her share of property.. I do the defensive thing very well.. I take no prisoners... She left me with 3 kids and got up to all sorts of dirty tricks to lay claim to houses we had etc etc...
The whole thing took 2 years, she borrowed money to fight me and eventually lost everything.... I was left with just the family home and 3 kids.. All my lives work and investment gone... The judicial system and barristers let me down..
I sometimes reflect on my life and look back at a time when I was 21 and had just returned from Vietnam as a Soldier only to find that my father had stolen all my savings... I had nothing to show for my 16 month stint...
What do I have to do to find someone to trust?
Im 66 now and have learnt to rely only on my own resources.... The PTSD is in limbo.... the Grey Nomad lifestyle and the prospect of meeting like minded people gives me hope and reasons to look forward to tomorrow.....
I look forward to meeting some if not all of you just to able to shake your hand knowing you too have been to hell and maybe back.. :)
one of the best things that I have enjoyed in my life is being alone on the road...
that might sound weird, but there never seem to be a point where I am alone..
there is always someone willing, wanting to talk TO YOU...
so recently, after a full day on the road heading up to Cairns.. I stopped at a roadside stop near Lighting Ridge..
the sun was going down early so I was wanting to get a fire on to cook tea... but a guy from another Van came over and started talking to me..
well, we talked for probably an hour.. just about crap, Caravans etc...
it put me behind in my timetable of getting a fire and tea on... but you known what? who cares..
I enjoyed his company, it was like a circuit breaker for the day.. it unswitched my brain from the focus that I was in...
ive met some terrific people on the road.. some weirdo's too..
but if you have made it onto our roads... you are living the dream that others only dream of..
Golddetectornomad said
10:29 PM Aug 27, 2014
The only folk who will think we are all a bit weird are the ones that see us all hugging round a camp fire somewhere when we do all eventually meet..at Greens?.....
Do you think as we all get older life actually gets a bit easier, apart from health issues that crop up,...as the pressures of raising kids, job commitments etc ease off, and we can start in a lot of cases for the first time in our lives to actually be ourselves, and not what we or others thought we should be?.....
A bit like when my first wife and I used to go to a nudist beach in S.A. everyone tends to be created equal when you don't wear the trappings of success or whatever...
On the road I find you are what, and who you actually are...and others are how you actually find them...no history's, assumptions, baggage and issues need be there unless we are asked 'Are we O.K.' or ask someone else genuinely 'Are they O.K.'....the only upside I've found to growing older is we have, or are learning, to understand ourselves and we actually have the time to genuinely care about others around us....just my thoughts...
I hope this thread is as beneficial for others that have participated as it has been for me to read your honest thoughts...all the best..Hoo Roo
Now this is bound to open a large can of worms.
When I got out of the airforce I worked doing everything from photocopier engineer to car salesman. I even worked for Centrelink as a personal adviser in the early 2000s.
We had a number of serious violent disturbances in our office, the one that sent me to the wall was when the boss lady was king hit by a female customer for not approving an early benefit transfer. That was the straw that broke my camel's back.
I was sent to the GP and he told me I had stress related depression, anxiety, PTSD, panic attacks and a few other mental nasties. I looked him in the eye and said "no way known, Ive been in aircraft that were hit by lightning, barracks fires and a few other high stress situations, how can I possibly be depressed?"
So I went to the shrink, he was excellent and proved to me that I was depressed. DAMN!!!
This is a black dog that stays with you for a long time. We as ex servicemen are meant to be tough and do the dose of concrete thing.
Its now well over 10 years since that terrible time, I attempted to terminate my life twice. I have since learnt how to deal with this crap.
The first thing is to acknowledge it yourself, if you are feeling blue and get no joy out of life you may be depressed. There should be no stigma any more. Society is becoming more educated about mental illness and perhaps more tolerant of those of us who sometimes have to hide in corners because of the stigma.
I keep a tight rein on my feelings and anxiety, Im off the medication and use this lifestyle as an anti depressant.
When I was teaching we had a number of kids make attempts at their lives, saddest thing you can ever see. Lets openly discuss this and get some activity to keep our people safe. Take care of yourself and keep an eye out for your mood. Lets work together to put this mongrel black dog down or at least asleep.
Safe travels
A few simple words can save a life "are you ok".
Another thing I have learnt: If it doing you no good, get rid of it. be it things, relationships. whatever
I was sick once, I got better.
Cheers.
Rocket
Yeah Rocket.
Are you OK? works for me.
Take care
Hi Phil
Good that you have shared that with us.
I know you will get a lot of support from all here as there are many who have a similar experience.
I consider myself most fortunate not to have had any experience with Depression or the like .
Keep posting and let us know if we can help at all.
I suffer from Black Dog but I am learning to control him. It all goes back to when I was 12 years of age and my mother demanded one night that I have sex with her when I refused she kicked me out of the house dressed only in underwear, shorts, cotton shirt, shoes and socks, it was the middle of winter and the temp. dropped to 5 degrees C. I went into the old mans car and froze the whole night , he couldn't even bring me a blanket to keep me warm. He slept in hid bed all warm and comfortable.
I once had a deep depression, with hard work, I overcame it.
I just checked the statistics, one in 5 will experience some type of mental illness, unfortunately, there's stigma and misunderstanding in the community.
If it returns, I'm not scared, it won't beat me, I'm in control.
Take care
mate found the can.
I have been llayed up in hospital for the last 6 weeks and will be 3-4 months before I am even close to normal.
I managed to pick up a Meningococcal strain in my spine a server infection that came to within 48 hrs of rendering paralyzed from the waist down.
I an still on antibiotics at home through a Picc line infusing 24 hrs a day Maybe for 3-4 more weeks. Before this hit me I was an above average fit 58 year old planing out big lap, We were going to run the business from the road.
Running a business which was going well now in jeopardy, the stress over the last 6 weeks has been enormous I thought I was as tough as nails When I hobbled back into my own living room yesterday on my crutches. I just broke down and wailed like a baby.
The realism of what almost happened hit me like a missile, and the fact that I am the business and I can not work in it for some. My saving grace is a couple of great mates that I can openly talk to and get my worries and concerns out in the open, and the fact that I can let it out, and if I need to sob my way through a hours deep and meaningful I can, I think this is the most important part in my view is being able to spill your guts to some one who will listen and who REALLY cares.
Anyway Que Que Sara Sara what will be will be.
I am trying to proceed using this motto Illegitimi non carborundum
Cheers
The Hats
Cripes, I have had my share also at different times and was really sad to hear about the GN's who have posted here, and hope your infection recovery goes well too Hats. More power to all of you !
Thanks Vic.
We all have our up and downs but we really don't know how bad it gets till you suffer it, Thankfully I haven't. But I can tell you first hand it effects the people around those that do.
Cheers
David
hi phil, yeah, I am ok.
omg. you have been through the mill. how on earth did you get that? keep talking to people, lots of love coming your way. kind regards, rocket
Thought i could handle it ok as all the bull**** & bravado the crew used to spruke it was considered weak to ask for or need help. Lucky for me i had "a mate" who could see the signs, talked to me & convinced me to stop drinking & seek help as the "Black Dog" was stalking me.
Taken me 10 years to get a better handle on it, in control most of the time now, but still have bad days.
Thank you GaryKelly I have learned to move on with my life but it is nice to know that people out there do care. Once again thank you so much.
Something all of us who travel alone can do is keep some sort of daily record of how we are feeling, actually feeling...can be as simple as a word in one corner of the diary...if we get out of the habit of knowing how we are feeling we will soon 'forget' how to talk about our feelings....If anyone see's pawsaroundoz in a camp site feel free to come over for a chat If I don't see you pull in....(just beware of the 'guard Whippets!)
annie
Mine was way back in the mid 1980's - thank goodness it never returned.
You are beautiful, heart people. The stories above have moved me to believe this is a good post.
Hats, you keep on kicking that disease in its cold butt. NEVER give up!
Annie, I keep a MSWORD document which I use as a diary. It reflects what we are doing, where we are (with photos) and a section on how Im feeling, works so well.
Lesley F welcome, you keep that black dog on his leash.
Cooee, thank you.
JRH you rock, keep going, I was fiddled with as a 7 year old by a 13 year old neighbour, so I have an inking of how you must feel.
There are probably a few I have missed, but thank you so much for sharing, sometimes its not easy. I have to tell you Im elevated and feeling magnificent right now.
Hugs and love to all of us.
-- Edited by Phil C on Wednesday 27th of August 2014 07:09:58 PM
With good caring people(like this forum),a smile,how ya going,ya want to have a cuppa,let them talk and listen intently and you could make a difference. You all take care. Pugs
At this point 276 people have read this thread.
Rather than just becoming No. 277 and just moving on, I would like to offer my heartfelt support to those of you "out there" who are, and have battled these issues.
I am one of the lucky ones I suppose. I myself have not experienced depression or anxiety (I think?), but I have seen it's effects close at hand. I have people close to me "that suffer". Just because what they are experiencing doesn't make sense to me does not diminish the suffering and anguish they are going through.
I don't want to make any condescending comments here, but just to say that this post has reminded me that I should contact those people I have mentioned here and just see how they're going.
Jeff
Been years of doctors, medications and physiologists and severe downs , but time and lots of love and care do heal , slowly
And yes , personal care and support are vital
Once we accept where we fit in the scheme of things and are comfortable in our own skins we can get on with life. Its more restricted than we perhaps anticipated but finding new paths to maximise enjoyment is the key... Motorhome or grey nomadding is definitely the answer.
Im with you..
its hard because every individual case can be, well, individual..
so you are in a dark place and can't "see" the way out...
people around you can't see the "dark" place that you are in and can't help...
I am ex RAEME of 12 years.. I've been out for over 13 years...
if your job is making you depressed then there are ways out..
ask yourself, what is the worst that can happen?
after I took discharge I ended up in the worst job ever in my life and I hated it.. the people there were total rsoles..
I wanted to leave ..
the mrs said that, we have a mortgage that we nee to pay so you need to find a job before you leave...
eventually I did.. but over the weeks I was in a hole I couldn't get out of and lost 6kg of weight in a short time..
when I finally got a job I didn't even finish my 2 weeks notice and when I got to the next job which was doing the same as the last job, it was totally different and I LOVED IT!!!!
looking back..
my mrs had a job and we could have done the sums and worked out that we could have paid the mortgage if I left my job... that would have got me out of the hole that I was in at the time.. at the time I couldn't see it and she couldn't see it..
if my mrs ever gets into a position where her work was over coming her, I know how to handle it.. I make enough money to pay the bills so I'd tell her to LEAVE that workplace and start looking for alternative work that she was happy in.. ..
if you are stuck in a job that is making you depressed, DO THE SUMS, and get out of it
but that is just a one case scenario..
if me or the mrs are in that position again I know what to do... cut the fat within the household and leave the job..
-- Edited by Blue on Wednesday 27th of August 2014 09:09:45 PM
Wow... the nightmares you must have undergone when someone so close to you has experienced so much pain... My heart goes out to you and the family.....
Your support was invaluable in and essential for her recovery...
4 years later and in 1996 my wife of 26 years ran off with a bloke from her work.... My treatment for PTSD had to go on the back burner as I was forced into a defensive mode to resist her fight to get more than her share of property.. I do the defensive thing very well.. I take no prisoners... She left me with 3 kids and got up to all sorts of dirty tricks to lay claim to houses we had etc etc...
The whole thing took 2 years, she borrowed money to fight me and eventually lost everything.... I was left with just the family home and 3 kids.. All my lives work and investment gone... The judicial system and barristers let me down..
I sometimes reflect on my life and look back at a time when I was 21 and had just returned from Vietnam as a Soldier only to find that my father had stolen all my savings... I had nothing to show for my 16 month stint...
What do I have to do to find someone to trust?
Im 66 now and have learnt to rely only on my own resources.... The PTSD is in limbo.... the Grey Nomad lifestyle and the prospect of meeting like minded people gives me hope and reasons to look forward to tomorrow.....
I look forward to meeting some if not all of you just to able to shake your hand knowing you too have been to hell and maybe back.. :)
Still on medication for it but in the process of weaning myself off it.
Was literally eating myself to death as a way of trying to cope.
I have some wonderful girlfriends who have allowed me to cry buckets on their shoulders.
Have taken myself to a hypnotherapist and this has helped so much.
Just being there for a person with depression and anxiety can mean more than you realize.
R U Ok?
Don't ever be embarrassed to ask for help.
It just might be closer than you think.
Most of you would be aware of Beyond Blue, here is their website, worth a read;
http://www.beyondblue.org.au/?gclid=CPTcgtmqs8ACFVQIvAodyi8A5Q
And if things are really bad don't forget Lifeline;
https://www.lifeline.org.au/
And if in WA, Samaritans, they also have an 1800 number for those in country areas;
http://www.thesamaritans.org.au/Home.aspx
(I worked for them for awhile as a volunteer telephone counsellor, very rewarding but also very draining).
Edit: Suicide Call Back Service is another worthwhile link;
https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/
-- Edited by Vic41 on Thursday 28th of August 2014 01:15:13 AM
one of the best things that I have enjoyed in my life is being alone on the road...
that might sound weird, but there never seem to be a point where I am alone..
there is always someone willing, wanting to talk TO YOU...
so recently, after a full day on the road heading up to Cairns.. I stopped at a roadside stop near Lighting Ridge..
the sun was going down early so I was wanting to get a fire on to cook tea... but a guy from another Van came over and started talking to me..
well, we talked for probably an hour.. just about crap, Caravans etc...
it put me behind in my timetable of getting a fire and tea on... but you known what? who cares..
I enjoyed his company, it was like a circuit breaker for the day.. it unswitched my brain from the focus that I was in...
ive met some terrific people on the road.. some weirdo's too..
but if you have made it onto our roads... you are living the dream that others only dream of..
Do you think as we all get older life actually gets a bit easier, apart from health issues that crop up,...as the pressures of raising kids, job commitments etc ease off, and we can start in a lot of cases for the first time in our lives to actually be ourselves, and not what we or others thought we should be?.....
A bit like when my first wife and I used to go to a nudist beach in S.A. everyone tends to be created equal when you don't wear the trappings of success or whatever...
On the road I find you are what, and who you actually are...and others are how you actually find them...no history's, assumptions, baggage and issues need be there unless we are asked 'Are we O.K.' or ask someone else genuinely 'Are they O.K.'....the only upside I've found to growing older is we have, or are learning, to understand ourselves and we actually have the time to genuinely care about others around us....just my thoughts...
I hope this thread is as beneficial for others that have participated as it has been for me to read your honest thoughts...all the best..Hoo Roo